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I'm happy that you and your partner have talked about boundaries. Or are you a Dominant, and you want to be in control of someone else?
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I just wanted to throw out something for discussion.
My partner has decided that they're okay with me going to someone to help me with my needs. It needs to be someone I don't know, and they need to be very discreet. First we'll talk about what to consider before engaging in a BDSM relationship, and then we'll talk about finding one. A widely-accepted definition of "BDSM" is "Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submissive, Sadism/Masochism." It's a very basic acronym for a very complex idea. There are as many different types and levels of kinks as there are kinksters.
I'm in a relationship where my partner is not interested in BDSM, but I am. They can't bring themselves to hit me — it makes them uncomfortable. I'm going to write this to try to help those who might not be as experienced, too. This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what to consider about you and BDSM.