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They say that eyes are the window to the soul, but if you really want to suss out what a woman is like, just take a quick glance inside her handbag.

So when Victoria Beckham opened up the contents of her black leather bag in a video released by fashion magazine Vogue this week, the results were tantalising.

As pretty much everything on this page is negative apart from the picture of wonder woman in her hot pants, I’ll kick things off on a more positive note with a few of my favourite American achievements: Awesome movies like “The Matrix” (1999) and “Flying High” (1980) Life changing books like “Catch 22” (1953) and “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” (1974) Brilliant albums like “LA Woman” (1971) and “Nevermind” (1991) Styling cars like the Corvette Stingray (1968) and the Plymouth Hemi Cuda (1971) Cutting edge bicycles like the Specialized Stumpjumper (1981) and the Merlin Titanium (1993) I didn’t really start out intending to make this point, but after listing a few of my favourite things, I then added dates and realised they are all from last century…

But the more I added to it, the less funny it looked, and the more like a train wreck.

Sadly, like the Roman empire, America’s days appear to be numbered.

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