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Although Mercury in Virgo turns to retrograde motion, that won’t stop you voicing your opinion.

The only difference is you’re being kept in the dark. Not until later in the week will you know what others are talking about behind your back.

He told me 15 minutes in that he'd broken up with his ex because she asked to sleep without his cats in bed.

He said, 'I told her the cats were there first, so she should go.' Then he invited me to his apartment for dinner and told me — very seriously — that his cat would let him know if he could date me or not.

My grandma happened to be there and said, 'Eric, it’s so great to see you, I just had coffee with your mom.'"'Grandma, how do you know Eric?

'"'His mom and I are cousins.'"We went four-wheeling and hung out as friends and swore we’d never tell anyone at work that we totally dodged a bullet." —l4390543fb "I was living in a new city and having met an interesting guy on a dating site, we decided to go to one of the city’s many museums.

But apparently I’m a glutton for punishment and I decided to keep going.

Halfway through, I had a small panic attack and they had to come and rappel me off the platform.

The first thing he did was give me drugstore perfume, a shirt with a picture of his band on it, and some business cards, 'in case my friends want his band to play.' Then literally everything he talked about was Kiss: how he liked Daft Punk because they protect their anonymity with helmets like Kiss did; how his Facebook page isn't his actual name, it's his Kiss name, so he can keep it ~authentic~..Even the normally taciturn ones are sighing audibly.A tingling sensation starts in my lower belly and seems to travel up into my head (like, where my brain is, not my penis). "So orgasm without sex or masturbation is actually possible? But the post-climax serenity he experienced were unlike anything he's ever felt.Dating apps: Can't live with them, can't live without them.But seriously, sometimes things go so wrong—like endless date with a cringe-worthy guy wrong—that you can't help but wonder why you're on the app in the first place.Then he went to my bathroom and after 15 minutes, I heard loud-ass poop sounds.


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